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nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby's Blog

recent thoughts on psychiatric medication

Posted on Dec 9th, 2007 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby
The Icarus Project: Navigating the Space Between Brilliance and Madness
Lots of mental health consumer/survivors dialog on dealing with personal "madness", or psychiactrically defined mental illness. The focus is on alternative ways of perceiving madness.

On the site forum there's an interesting thread on medications.
Icarus Project - medications

Today I made a post to the Icarus Project website.
Thought I'd share my post here.


I'm someone who is a survivor of being an inmate in a state hosptal. I spent six months at Marlboro State Hospital in New Jersey almost 40 years ago, 1969-70. I was dosed heavy with the old anti-psychotics like Thorazine and Stellazine.

I was diagnosed as schizophrenic and told I would have to take these medications for the rest of my life. Two weeks out of the state hospital I stopped taking the medications entirely. The side effects to me were unacceptable. Mostly the mind-numbing quality comes to mind.

Today I'm a psychiatric survivor. I've worked with the system for many years. I worked in several institutions in Pennsylvania, including three state hospitals. I've seen much medication abuse like practices of "pouring heavy", meaning staff deciding to give extra medication, beyond doctor's order. It seems obvious to me that many times the medications were given as a means of control rather than therapy.

What works for my ongoing recovery from mental distress is spiritual practice. I was very lucky to connect with meditation and other spiritual practices about a year and a half after leaving the state hospital. I've kept up the spiritual practices since and today they've become great personal tools, treasures really.

Spirituality is many things to many people. I think of spirituality as "connection and meaning", whatever that is for the individual. Can be a religious practice but can be taking a walk in the park, or observing one's own mind.

I've personally come to terms with enough of the ground of my own mind to be able to deal with various mindstates, some personally difficult or challenging. Some of these very mindstates were the basis of my "schizophrenia". At the time of my schizophrenic experience, I didn't have the tools or the ability to handle the tools that I do now. Some of the non-ordinary mindstates I experienced during schizophrenia have never gone away really. Actually I've learned ways to come to terms with and benefit from the non-ordinary perceptions.

I'm just a human being really, like everyone else. Nobody really great. I do think however we all have great potential. In my opinion, psychology/psychiatry needs to focus more on human potential rather than fixing the breakdowns. What is "normal", what is "sane"? I was never attracted to the definitions of sanity implicit in the DSM pscyhiatric diagnostic manual.

What I'm saying is that mental illness can be dealt with in many ways other than the prevailing psychiatric model(s). I know that working with my own mind for me has brought me great benefit. I'm happier than I ever have been in my life. Sure, I still have lots of problems, but I've learned methods to work with my own mindstates.

I sincerely wish that many find the ways to work with their own minds in positive, beneficial ways.
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homestyle thanksgiving dinner

Posted on Nov 22nd, 2007 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby
thanksgiving octopus2

thanksgiving octopus

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Maitreya Project

Posted on Nov 18th, 2007 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby
9a
This morning a friend called and said she was on her way to visit the Buddha relics in Philadelphia. First I had heard of this. Somehow I got it together and Heather and I drove down to Philly.

Seeing the relics was quite an experience. It was so wonderful to be present with these sacred artifacts of Buddhist lineage masters. The relics on this leg of the tour were housed at a Cambodian Buddhist temple in Philadelphia.

Ultimately the relics will be housed in a 50-story tall statue of Maitreya under construction in Northern India.

Maitreya Project



About the relics from the Maitreya Project press release:

The collection includes relics of the historical Buddha and the Buddha’s closest
disciples as well as other well-known Buddhist masters from Chinese, Indian and
Tibetan traditions.

This is a rare opportunity to view Buddhist relics as they are usually enshrined and
rarely even visible to the public.

The relics were found among the cremation ashes of Buddhist masters. They
resemble beautiful pearl-like crystals. Buddhists believe the relics embody the
master’s spiritual qualities of compassion and wisdom and have been deliberately
produced by the master so that all may share in their blessing.

Maitreya Project website: http://www.maitreyaproject.org/en/index.html



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Allen Ginsberg's Death

Posted on Apr 5th, 2007 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby
Real cool.

In honor of Allen Ginsberg, who died 10 years ago today,  a filmmaker named Jonas Mekas has put up a video of Allen Ginsberg's death on the internet.

Gehlek Rimpoche, the great living Tibetan Buddhist teacher conducted Allen's funeral with traditional Buddhist ritual.  Some of the video takes place in Allen's apartment and some at a Dharma hall. One can identify a few beat characters and friends.

The video is over an hour long. The quality of the
video is not so great, kind of like a home video. It has not been edited. However it's really
great seeing this video.

You can watch the video as a stream or download it here:
http://www.ubu.com/film/mekas.html

Gehlek Rimpoche's sangha, Jewel Heart:
http://www.jewelheart.org/
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my ram dass experience

Posted on Mar 11th, 2007 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby
In Spring of 1969, I journeyed to Cambridge Mass. I stayed in house with several residents. One was a student of Ram Dass his who had dropped out of Harvard to get into the spirituality that Ram Dass was teaching at the time. While others of us were carrying on with late sixties psychedelia, this person, Scott I think his name was, would sit and watch, meditate perhaps and draw caracatures.

That fall I went off the deep-end. I experienced a near-death and powerful visionary experiences for which I was hospitalized in a state institution. Following discharge, I felt really drained and enervated on many levels. Didn’t quite know how to process what I had gone through. About a year later, in spring of 1971, *Be Here Now* came out. I devoured the book, really took many of the teachings to heart. Immediately I gave up drinking, smoking and eating meet and waited for my guru.

For the next few months I checked around the spiritual scenes a bit. I saw Swami Satchitananda, remembering him from Woodstock where he blessed the crowd. I read a few spirituality books, but generally speaking bided my time. In the fall of 1971 I heard of a young 13 year old guru, Maharaji, on a late night radio show in New York. I connected with this “guru” and found myself in India in November.

A large group of us “westerners” were camped on a dusty site with big tents between Old and New Delhi called Ram Lila ground. One of the group was this American guy who went by the name Sita Ram. He now goes by Rampuri and has an interesting story. I recently read his recent book called Baba. Here’s his website:
http://www.rampuri.com/

I think it was Sita Ram who said that Ram Dass was in town at a local hotel in New Delhi right on Connaught Circus located in the center of town. I was excited and managed to get the address of where Ram Dass was staying.

I went to town and knocked on the door of the hotel. Ram Dass invited me up and I sat on a small third floor balcony overlooking the town circle. With Ram Dass I related my story as best I could. I told him of some of my experiences, including spiritual experiences and the abuse of the mental hospital. Ram Dass shared with me some regarding the experiences of his brother who had 'lost it'.

Basically Ram Dass suggested that my experiences were authentically spiritual, not just crazy hallucinations. This was a great gift for me as I really didn’t have many reference points for what I had experienced. The perspective that Ram Dass' offered remains with me today. I believe there are many who are diagnosed with schizophrenia or bi-polar disease or other “mental illness” syndromes that can greatly benefit by holding some or all experience as spiritual in nature and not just psychotic hallucination.

In "going off the deep end" I had been in effect blasted by spirit. I had experienced the full force of spirit all at once and, being quite unprepared, was literally ungrounded. It has been my work of  more than 35  years to integrate and come to terms with the spiritual energies that opened up in me.
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another take on refuge

Posted on Dec 31st, 2006 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby

an example of taking refuge in the Dharma as stated by HH Dalai Lama

as appears in the Snow Lion Dalai Lama Quote of the Week

It wouldn't be bad if you didn't have statues, but it has become indispensable to have Buddhist texts which deal with the structured path to train our mind. If you have Buddhist texts, read them for yourselves and to friends who visit. That way you can help others to understand Buddhist ideas. For instance, it is interesting to read Milarepa's life story and songs. We find in them many enlightening lessons. Buddha's image alone will not purify us of karmic obscuration.... It is very important to study the scriptures. They are not to be just stacked up on the altar. They must be cultivated in our mind. ...[we] take great interest in having the symbolic representations of Buddha's body, speech and mind. I feel it is more important to acquire and read scriptures, the symbolic representations of his speech. You can pay homage to them, you can make offerings to them; above all, you should study them.

--from Generous Wisdom: Commentaries by H.H. the Dalai Lama XIV on the Jatakamala translated by Tenzin Dorjee edited by Dexter Roberts

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refuge

Posted on Dec 31st, 2006 by nagabobby : Spiritual Healing nagabobby
T06
I take refuge in the Buddha
I take refuge in the Dharma
I take refuge in the Sangha

What does it mean to take refuge?
I have heard that to a Buddhist is one who takes refuge in the three jewels
    Buddha, Dharma, Sangha

Refuge is not about submission
Refuge is about reliance on the three jewels

Refuge has several levels of meaning
    One can picture (visualize) a representation of Buddha, Dharma, Sangha out there
    One can take refuge in one's own future Budda, one's own future enlightenment
       one's own pure Dharma, the essential pure wisdom of enlightened realization
       one's own pure Sanha, the community of enlightened beings
            one would like to take birth in
    There's more......
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